America Is A Survivor Too!

I have been so anxious and stressed wondering what we could have done, what I could have done... to have obtained a different outcome regarding this election.

He mentioned that Trump would have said it was Rigged and that there would likely have been (I am paraphrasing) chaos and protesting just like there is now. Trump was preparing his followers for this.

In fact, there would likely have been MORE violence if those people had been the ones to lose and feel much like we do now. All in all, I think it worked out the way it was supposed to.

Think about this, my friend...

We create our own reality. We are ALL connected to a Universal Consciousness. Separation is just an illusion. Those who thrive on "us and them" really do not know that we are all one.

Those of us who have dealt with abuse, loss, suffering and other major challenges in our lives know that the greatest storms create the biggest changes. Those changes promote the greatest growth. We come out the other side of the storm as a greater version of ourselves. We can never go back nor would we ever want to.

America is going through a major storm. It will get worse before it gets better. It WILL get better though. The future generations will benefit from our suffering. The changes we make now will change America forever. Let us be our best when things are at their worst. Let us stand together and stand up for what we believe in even if we are standing alone.

We are at the ground floor of creating a new and improved America. How can we fight FOR diversity and acceptance when we are doing just the opposite by fighting AGAINST each other?

Remember, we do create our own reality with our thoughts, words and actions. Be sure these are all in alignment in order to create the change that you truly want.

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Making Right Choices Post Abuse/Communication Is Key

Making the right choices, saves us from making excuses. Excuses for ourselves and the behavior of those around us. We learn to do this throughout our lives. We gaslight ourselves into accepting less than we deserve from people who are not really what we need them to be because we WANT a part of what they offer. We often make their excuses for them because we do not really want to know what they are thinking. We create this imaginary reality and are always disappointed. Why? Because our fantasy version of this person and/or situation is not what most of us know as reality. It is what we want therefore we choose to believe that it is true. It becomes our reality alone.

It is another hard habit to break but once we do there is not going back. We recognize that we are doing it and refuse to gaslight ourselves any longer as we know we are worthy of everything good great and wonderful in this life. We NEVER again are willing to settle to have people in our lives who simply are not what and who we need. We choose to see people and things for what they are now. No more selective amnesia. No more cognitive dissonance. No more lies to us from others or to ourselves. I spent years talking about things. Things I wanted to change about myself, my life and the people in it. I lost 70 lbs. I created that reality for myself after talking about it repeatedly for years. That was but one of MANY things in my life that I have since acted upon. What kind of relationships I wanted and what I no longer would put up with. I chose to be alone for years now because I will never again accept less than I am willing to give. I am still giving and generous but no longer to my own detriment. Even the best friends in the world will not always know what is best for you nor will they chose to do what is best for you regardless of how it effects them. We always need to put ourselves first. This is healthy not selfish. When we EXPECT others to do what is best for us, we will always be disappointed. I learned this a long time ago after years of waiting to meet someone who would care about me enough to always do what is best for me. I met that person... that person is me.

Now if I want something done, I do it. Then it's done and I am happy. I feel accomplished and satisfied. I do not wait for someone else to do it for me or expect that someone will do something simply because I believe it's the "right" thing to do and I am "hoping" that they will make the "right" decision. This is another trap that we set for ourselves during out codep years. We then blame others in our minds for not doing "the right thing" when we in fact NEVER communicated what it was that we needed from them. It is a kind of passive aggressive behavior. (I won't tell you my needs because that might upset you so I wait for you to do or say the "right thing" when you do I think you are a God and when you don't, I make excuses for why you did not. The bottom line is that "my" needs never get met and I accept less and less. We can spend our lives talking about what we want our lives to be or we can create our reality right now in that moment.

The Confidence To Work Again! Part 1 // Healing From Narcissistic Abuse ...

Why Do Narcissistic Mother's Give Away What We Hold Most Dear?

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How Do Those Who We Spend Time With Effect Us?

by C. Meagan Michael

Separation is an illusion. While we are the only ones who can change who we are, those who we keep around us have a great impact on our hearts, minds and thoughts.

People's words and actions will be in your thoughts when you spend time with them. Our thoughts create our reality. If you are constantly speaking with someone negative you will have a very difficult time staying positive. You will have difficulty manifesting the abundance that you so deserve.

"If you lie with the dogs you are going to get fleas" You have heard this before? Well on a spiritual level there is great truth to it.

Pick and choose wisely those whom you hold close and dear. Limit the time spent with nags, complainers, pessimists and "Debbie Downers" No contact with toxic people who wish you nothing but harm and spend their every waking and sleeping moment plotting on how to accomplish that. Embrace those who are there for you during your worst trials and tribulations.

These are your real friends. Love them with all your heart.

#IAmKratom #SaveKratom Show Your Support! Share This Video!

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Gratitude In The Face Of Adversity - Take Back Your Power Now!

Maintain an attitude of gratitude even in the face of adversity. Calmness and peace of mind enable you to remain connected to source energy.

Toxic People expect you to be in fear. Scared people run. I am not running. When evil thinks you are alone and helpless they pounce on you thinking you have no defense.

When they know you have financial difficulties and assume that you could never afford an attorney they feel very powerful. It feeds their need for greed.

The Toxic Landlord in this complex blew me away the other day by handing me an unfair and undeserved eviction notice. She thinks I am alone, that I have no family who cares about me and that she can take advantage of me because of my past situation. Narcissist jump all over your misfortune. They prey on the weak and disabled. They are not fierce and brave like we are. They are pussies. Predators who prey on the weak like many animals in the wild will attack their own if they are injured.

This woman has fucked with the wrong tenant this time. It is time that we are former victims, stand up like the survivors and thrivers that we are and take back what is ours!

Our dignity and our lives...

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Do Empaths Vote For Trump?

I am suddenly wondering if any Empath in this country is planning on voting for Trump. I could not understand how anyone could vote for him before now. Now as I understand how different we are from the rest of society I see that ... they do not see.

I have no love for Hillary and I am not a politically motivated person. It's all a front. However, I look at the vast numbers of comments from Trump Supporters, people who are adamantly pro Trump and my stomach turns. I can't even watch him speak. He triggers me so completely. I see and feel the threat that he poses. So strongly that it is almost tangible.

Now I understand why. When you are an Empathic Healer you feel the intentions of others. You know what they really mean even when they don't. We read between the lines and ignore what is written on them. We know in our souls in a way that others do not. We know truth. We feel it.

Anyone who takes him at face value could think that he is what he boasts he is. Those of us who are awake and aware, who KNOW... we know who and what he truly is and that frightens us.

I believe Hillary will be the same kind of "leader" that we have always had. Controlled by big money in the background. He would be controlled only by his false ego. Narcissists rage when they are confronted with truth. They find power in bullying. They are haters of themselves but finger pointers to those around them, as they project their insecurities and self hatred onto you.

Do Narcissists Feel? Sue's Journey Comment / My Reply

Sue's Journey:
The puppies.. Yay. You fixed your computer.. Yay. Where do I begin? So much in this video. It all makes sense. Recently I found myself getting really angry with someone I love. A friend said: that anger could be that you sense there is a lie being told. That got my stirred up. This person wasn't overtly lying.. I could tell. But, there WAS a lie I was feeling. Something didn't fit. I needed to figure it out. I did. The lie was one this person was telling themselves.. A wound. And I sensed that. It made me angry. I see through body language.. That "thing" you talked about. I believe that my narc abusers could see in my body language too. Yes, Narcs are masters at watching and sizing us up. I believe that. And just like, I couldn't hide my body language from them, they couldn't either. They KNEW that my words were saying one thing but my body language was revealing the truth. The truth is: they despised me. I saw it. But my truth is: I despised them too! :))



C. Meagan Michael:
Interesting revelations this morning, Sue. I had not thought of that angle. Everyone has unconscious body language. The feet are great tellers of truth. Someone could be looking at you nodding and "listening" but their feet are pointed toward the door. They want to leave the conversation. I TOTALLY know what you mean about someone lying to themselves and you picking up on it. All the time. It happens all the time. I think it's interesting because we all lie to ourselves in life. For better or worse. As we awaken spiritually our truths become apparent. As we accept our truth and grow we see that we are not so different from our abusers. We also project. We also live in a fantasy.. often the one they create. #SharedPsychosis #FutureFaking etc. Not to mention we lie to ourselves #CognitiveDissonance to make it okay for us to remain with them. We make (I know you know this) excuses for their bad behavior because it would be intolerable to believe that we are purposely staying with someone who, as you said, despises us! In fact I was even thinking this morning, how at the end I started exaggerating my past a bit (with my ex predator... just minor things that made me seem stronger, more capable, more accomplished because I felt SO low...) I was of course desperately seeking validation from my invalidator. Surely a sign that it was time to move on. Can they tell that we despise them? I think at the end when we truly do that would be hard to miss. Though much of the relationship we are not feeling that way. We have lied to ourselves enough and live in the rose colored world that we created in our mind. We are not really in love with them. We are in love with the fantasy that we created. When the veil is lifted and reality sets in... it is mind blowing and shocking to learn that we have in fact duped ourselves for so long. Bottom line is that they believe we hate them all along. They believe (mistakenly) that we are plotting against them, because they can not fathom that we care about them. As we know they hate themselves. We do not "deserve" respect in their eyes because we "love" "admire" and "adore" the person they hate the most... themselves. In conclusion :), I wonder if they see our body language and understand it, if they are merely projecting all along and always assume that we loath them the way they do us, or both. Your thoughts?

Here is the link to the video we are discussing:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZcQjvnF5Oo&feature=gp-n-y&google_comment_id=z12wznlgynebhpjwa04chpkrsxyncrcwwuw0k

Empathic Healers Having A Spiritual Awakening! Is This You?

Narcissistic Mother's Piano Student/Childhood Friend Appears!

How It All Begins... Manipulative Manipulators Have "Manipulationships!"

by C. Meagan Michael

Manipulators do not have relationships. They have "manipulationships." They target Empaths/Highly Sensitive People. People who, like us, would run to the ends of the earth to save someone's life and/or resolve their issue whatever it is. They see this in us.

They are excellent at reading people. In the beginning they love bomb us. It is more than just putting on ones "best face" they monopolize our time, thoughts, resources. The buy us lavish gifts (all things being relative) they lavish us with flattery and praise.

They are intently listening to everything we tell them about ourselves, our lives and our past. They seem to validate us. We tell them more and more. What we do is hand them over our self worth. We don't realize it at the time. Little by little they start to do what Begood4000 has termed "The Doo Doo Test" They throw in little digs or put downs. They do this to see how and if we respond.

Our gut says, "OUCH that's not right!" our minds make say, "what did I do wrong?" We clearly think we did something to make this person who "adores", values and worships us say something cruel like that. Something that undermines our confidence. We sweep it under the rug. By this time we are in love and enmeshed.

If we weren't we'd have packed up and hauled tail as soon as this happened. People with healthy self esteem/self love would feel smothered by the amount of overt attention these people pay to us in the beginning. People who are more secure would not fall prey to empty flattery. Though Toxic People sometimes do a good job of making flattery sound like a genuine compliment.

While I do believe that anyone can be a potential victim, I believe those of us suffering from Childhood Neglect and Childhood Trauma are far more susceptible and until we become awake and aware... easy targets.

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Help Me Reach 200 Subscribers On My Youtube Channel To Celebrate 2 YEARS Free From Narcissistic Abuse! #NoContact

My friends, mi amigas y amigos, meine Freunde, if you have not subscribed to my channel subscribe now! This week it is my anniversary! 2 YEARS having broken free from my narcissistic ex-predator and all the toxic people in my former life. My @Youtube channel currently has 196 Subscribers and 18187 views! My goal is to have 200 subscribers to represent the 2 years I have been free! Will you help me reach this goal? Help me celebrate being free from abuse for 2 years by subscribing to my youtube channel. Show your support to survivors everywhere. Help us to thrive!

Thank you to all my wonderful friends/subscribers who have helped my channel grow and grow so that I now reach thousands of people world wide. I love you all so much!

#Gratitude

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1CLdLHnJQeralLeqGSeKFA

If You Don't Address It, Then You Will Repress It! #MusicalInterlude

Change Your Thinking, Heal Yourself! "The Position of Toxic Manipulator Has Been Eliminated"

By C. Meagan Michael

In order for us to transition from Victim To Survivor (and THRIVE!) we need to change our thinking in many dramatic ways. Our thought processes throughout our lives did not serve us. Unless we are willing to take an honest look at where our thinking was flawed and replace it with resolutions to old problems, we will remain exactly where we have been. Constantly creating the same situations with new people taking the place of the old.

Delving into our trauma enables us to ascertain why we think this way and where those thoughts originated. People who are not ready to make this move may find it triggering and even victim blaming. There is no blame here. We are not responsible for the abuse we suffered. We are responsible for not suffering it again with someone new.

Like a job that is no longer available. "We have eliminated the position of toxic manipulator. Those of you currently holding this position, take your stuff and exit the building. If you are still here when I count to 3 security will escort you out."

Notice there are no please's and thank yous. We have done enough of that with these people. Spending our lives finding a problem for every solution is not just a narc/toxic habit, it's a victim habit as well. I just addressed that in my next video which I am uploading currently. Thanks for sharing...#Peace

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Scapegoats Are The Narcissists Human Trash Receptacle! -- Am I A Narcissist?

By C. Meagan Michael
If you are wondering if you are a narc means you are surely not a narc. Narcissists are not introspective. They are always right. They have no accountability and take no responsibility for anything negative even in their own lives. Whatever happens, is "your" fault. Hence the Scapegoat. Narcissists MUST have someone to blame for their deeds and focus their flaws on. They can not carry around all this trash externally and they do not internalize it. They need us. We are their human trash receptacles.

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Sassy Boo Angel - MyDogSas / It's Been Two Years...

It's been two years Sassy Boo. I still love you and think about you all the time. I pray that my ex-predator is taking great care of you. I know taking you from me was done in an effort to break me. You will be happy to know that it did not work.

I know that cruel Flying Monkey Edith helped ex-predator to change the names on your microchip while I was in the hospital recovering from a suicide attempt that was prompted by 8 years of abuse. I am grateful that she uses her Financial Security to show off by doing nice things for you. For this I am grateful. Your good health and continued happiness warm my heart.

Sassy, there are very bad people in this world. Luckily for you, they always care what other people think. Ex-predator is all about image and being perceived as victim and savior.

So, you are "owned" by two of the most toxic, self-absorbed, vain creatures on the planet who will always take great care of you because they need to keep up appearances. Imagine what an exhausting job it is to have to keep your lies straight and put on a mask every day of you life pretending to be what you are not. You are such an angel. You never see the evil in people, only the good.



When someone is incapable of emotions, empathy, love, and concern they mimic the emotions of others. Often it looks very fake and over the top because they glean their information from movies and TV. It's all an act. An over the top drama filled evil seeking empty life for them.

I am sorry to tell you that you are just a thing to them, you are not seen as a sovereign being with thoughts, feelings, and emotions all your own. If they could feel and empathize they would never have taken you from me knowing how much we love each other. We were just pawns to be played in their toxic game. Sadly, baby girl, some people use human children in the exact same way.

I am sorry that I was not strong enough at the time to fight for you. I know you understand this better than anyone. We were together during the worst of times but together we had the best of times. 

I will always be grateful to you my sweet angel. You taught me how to love and be a dog mommy. I adopted 2 dogs and 2 cats since we parted. You would love them and they, you. Meagan says you taught me how to be a great mommy and she wanted me to tell you "thanks." <3

Had you not come into my life and taught me that I was lovable and shown me that not everyone who displays signs of love has an agenda. Sometimes love truly is love and pure source energy.

Remember, we are all connected by the universal consciousness. We are all connected to and by source. Separation is just an illusion. I still feel you. I still love you. I am so grateful for every moment we spent together. Our 2 earth years together changed my life. Thank you for coming into my world and loving me Sassy.

Forever my girl. Forever your mommy,
C

Response To Fight Narcissism's Video - Toxic Shame, Pride & Narcissists

by C. Meagan Michael

I think the worst thing in these abusive relationships may be them attacking our shame. We "confess" to them and reveal our heart and mind's greatest shame(s). They have love bombed the snot out of us. We feel safe. We finally feel loved, secure and accepted. We have also externalized our self-worth. We have given it to our predator. All the while they PROUDLY keep storing all your pushable shame buttons in their cerebral hard drive ready to push them at just the right moments... your wedding, birthday, Xmas, a party, in public, when you feel really good about yourself etc. My mother used to always tell me that I could tell her anything. I bought into this for most of my life until I wised up and realized that nothing I told her benefitted me. It was juicy gossip for her to share with my toxic brother and toxic aunt. To be used against me and publically humiliate me. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change. The courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. I accept that I can not change my mother or any other toxic person. I am brave enough to change myself. I know the difference. <3

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People Pleasing Is Displeasing To People - "They stand in judgement of our imperfections as we are standing before them trying to perfect them"

I awakened this morning with this message to share. We must allow others to live through and experience their own lessons in life. Our perpetual people pleasing ways are not allowing people to grow and learn.

Often we appear offensively arrogant in appearance as we try to "make it all better" for everyone around us. Do we have all our own "stuff" together? Are we perfect?
We lived and learned our own lessons. Has anyone ever said to you, "You need to feel better" and then you did? No, because you have not done the work. We need to process the information.

Life Lessons are what life is all about. That is how we understand and grow. Our Narcissistic Parents did not raise us this way. They did not allow us to experience, learn, grow and feel for ourselves. They muted all of our experiences and trained us to mute theirs.

We come into our new post abuse life in this same way. With all good intentions without proper people or parenting skills. Often people with pure hearts and the best of intentions can be the most hurtful and offensive.

Sometimes that hurtful and offensive person is us.

As we grow and heal we learn to reparent ourselves. When we understand how this is done and why it makes it so much easier to stop trying to "fix" everyone around us.

How many people have you ever truly "fixed" in this life with your good intentions and well meaning chats, time spent, all effort in, selflessness with others.

We mean well and as distasteful as it is to consider, we often waste our time talking "at" people who do not want  to hear what we have to say. They are not ready for the message that they have not yet learned for themselves.

Are we trying to tell them what to do? How can we fix others when we ourselves are broken?

Become the person you want to be and you will attract those people into your life. We can not fix anyone in this life time. We can only coach them and help them to find themselves once we have learned how to do this for ourselves.

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Fight Narcissism & C. Meagan Michael: Thoughts On Being Reborn In Midlife / My Life Part 2

Fight Narcissism writes: 

 

I think it is a great gift, really - those of us who got to be 'reborn' so to speak. Yes, it was as painful and frightening as actually being delivered originally (I suppose!) but when we dig deep inside to the meaning of it we can live truly connected lives afterward.

I will see if I can find the video I watched (or maybe it was an article) about this very act of being 'reborn' at mid-life. The description in it was so affirming and positive. Have you seen what I am talking about? I cannot remember where I ran across it.

You will write your book, I am sure of it! You have so much to say and are very eloquent. You can do it!!

#unicorntales #writerswrite ♥☻

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C. Meagan Michael writes:

Unicorns Have Long Tales.. How is that for a title?

I LOVE what you said about ..."we can live truly connected lives afterward." SO well said. Sounds like a statement directly from source energy. <3

I agree. It is surely a gift. A hec of a painful looong term gift that keeps giving long after. I mean that honestly as well as sarcastically. I hated what my life had become. I did not know how to better myself because like many of us, I compared myself to the evil that surrounded me and in my mind that made me a selfless angel.

I think it is unfair and cruel that so many people live their entire lives in a victim mentality. Always feeling better than others, always judging themselves against other, doing foolishly selfless things (not the same as wise selfless things, as I am learning) like putting ourselves in harms way for total strangers and/or people who are horrible to us and don't deserve the time of day yet for us to risk our last day or dollar on earth.

I think that was the worlds longest run on sentence. Let's just go with it...

The part that is truly a cruel trick of our own brain is that WE EXPECT that same degree of perceived loyalty, honesty, bravery, selfless foolishness etc. We are always always always disappointed and "victimized" by the same people/type of people, over and over because they DO NOT CHANGE.

For some reason we think we can change others. That our kindness will be contagious. That if we offer a pair of our rose colored glasses to other and show them how to use them, that they will lose their harsh cynical ways and learn to live a happy life.

We think all kinds of untruths. We gaslight the hell out of ourselves.

It is nothing short of a miracle that we are able to be reborn, as you say, in midlife. For many of us who were done with life as we knew it... this is the only viable alternative.

I often wish it was easier. Less exhausting. Day after day, of upheaval. Life throwing new lessons at us at the same time that we are processing and reprocessing old ones until we extract the origin. The root information. When we learn the lesson completely and move on... is there such a time? I see that the same situations are creating more and more lessons as I process them through out time.

No, I have never seen that article or blog. I got the message directly from source. #MyLifePart2

xox Love you bunches Unicorn!

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A Wholly Holy New Life - Suicidal Contemplations With No Ideations

By C. Meagan Michael

Why does suicide appeal to anyone ever?

When life feels hopeless and there is no end in sight
to the pain and the suffering
you feel like human blight

A mistake of humanity
To which you don't belong
Why didn't she abort me
How did this go so wrong?

Who am I
Why am I
I don't understand

Do I serve a purpose
Other than the task at hand

Did I misunderstand the directions in life
Turning always left when I should have turned right

It pains me to contemplate how I can feel this way
Why do I regret living yet another day

Romanticizing suicide for all of my life
Even at my best
Hope of death
Underlined my life

Knowing I am part of a greater purpose matters
That I chose to live this life of tatters
I must have known I was strong enough to handle this choice
That I am who I am and I do have a voice

Am I supposed to shout to the heavens that life is so great
When I don't believe that
Is this my fate?

Though grateful I am to be here today
Understanding who I am in a wholly holy new way

Before we arrived here we did make a choice
We chose our parents, our life and our voice
Why did I choose such a challenging life
I could have been a man with 3 kids and a wife

Yet I have accepted this difficult fate
Overcoming challenges at this I am great
Who knew I would be so resilient a soul
Oh yes, that was me, this was my soul's goal

So, while I question my reason today
Living my life a wholly holy new way
I am blessed to know that one day I'll be free
But today my freedom I have found inside of me

The End

... is only the beginning.

When Life Looks Like Death and Death Gives Hope To Life - Suicide?

I will never know the full truth but I know this as my whole life truth right now... when you allow people to judge you based on your diagnosis you will never know who you truly are. When you define yourself by your diagnosis you are not living your authentic life. You are merely a puppet for the world to manipulate as they wish. You have given up your rights and thoughts as a human being. You are given medication that mutes your senses and therapy that mutes your thoughts. You are dead. You are disconnected from soul. You move around like a zombie from place to place and person to person hoping and praying that one day someone will "care about you and take care of you" because you do not know how to do this for yourself. When you are raised to be fully dependent and forced to believe you are fully disabled due to lifelong programming.. life looks like death and death looks like life. It is no wonder suicide was such an appealing "option" for my former self and others.

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July 22, 2016 Facebook Post About - The Narcissist Next door!

Jun 22, 2016 7:53am

This happened yesterday: True story... I AM DOING YOU A FAVOR ____________________________ "Friend"; "I am going to buy a house with a pool! Well really a mobile home but with an above ground pool." Me: I knew you were thinking of moving. I will miss you. "Friend"; Yes I am. I told my bf that you are going to move in with me. my brain: (huh?) Friend: "Now I have certain RULES!! - ( huh? x2)" (Listening to the rules was actually listening to... i do this and that and that is how it is. You cant do this or that or complain about my cluttered kitchen that is not used for cooking or my laundry that stays in the machine for days...." ) ie I am not perfect but you have to be whilst not complaining about my "imperfections") "Friend"; "Do NOT tell my bf you are gay!! ( word said with utter digest and ignorance."} (coming from a straight woman who tries to flirt her ass off with me all the time.) Me:"It's none of his business." ( lost in confusion and wanting the convo to stop but it'd just begun" Friend: "You will have your "OWN ROOM!" ( holy shit...a whole room! - de ja fucken vu)) I will only charge you.....$$$.00 plus 1/2 all utilities ( no wifi because she doesnt know how to use a computer ) Me: I pay that now and I have a full 2/2 apt. I also have cats and you are deathly allergic I thought. Friend: "Oh your one cat likes me. Shes fine. My brain: (really... and now your now allegic because a cat likes you. What about my son Chevy?) ( and how long will it take you to "force me to get "rid" of my cats because you think you have me by the balls? ) ( BEEN THERE DONE THAT ) My Mouth said: "Chevy is a good boy too. He is not around anyone but me usually. You have to get to know him: ( dear lord I realized the old pattern of what I was doing.... I stopped) I said, "I will miss you when you move. i never thought of coming with you. What do you mean all the neighbors know I am gay. (The ones I told or the ones YOU told) Friend: Also I dont want ANYONE to know WE smoke anything. ME; ( WE dont... ) I said I dont tell anyone what you do. I dont want anyone to know if I do or don't. Friend: well "sally" knows WE do but she loves to smokes too. (Huh? x10) (I dont love it. nuff said) (I am hearing what is none of my business just like "sally" heard about me...I am more nauseous) gossip covered in bull shit is just dirty smelly gossip. Me: "I said what town? We are staying in this town right?"( I LOVE IT HERE and she knows that ) Friend: NO! The water charges are too high ( in the most inexpensive and beautiful place I have ever lived) our town. Me: I only pay 53 monthly. That is fine. Friend: "I am DOING YOU A FAVOR to HELP YOU. I TOLD "BOB" ( pseudonym her bf) but I still have to talk it over with my shrink." What about ME? You'd think I WOULD be the most important person to talk to. I suppose when someone feels superior to you... like a pet? This is a woman who soetimes heard but never listened to a thing I said about my life dreams goals... or rather that is boring because we are not talking about her. ( she simply does not give a damn or both) Me; ( for the sake of seeing the areas and checking out places because I enjoy it) "Lets start looking and then we will get to know eachother and see if we even like the same things" "Id rather have you as a friend forever from a distance than an enemy in a month" (betcha I rarely if ever hear from her again once she moves away) I cant baby sit her dog or clean her carpet ( holy shit she thinks I am the nanny/maid???) "Friend"- NO!! I wont look now. The market is not "good until the end of summer" ( what does that have to do with what I was talking about) (plus what hogwash is that?) ME:" my lease needs to be renewed in Oct. Friend: ( in one ear and out the other ) Me- " I am going to take a shower. " (gee, I used her water. I wonder if she will send me the bill ) ~sarcasm MY THOUGHTS ______________ Why do I still attract and "befriend" narcissists and users. I am damaged still but not stupid nor desperate. I would live in a shelter ( just an example.) before I would ever move in with a controlling narcissist again in my life. I must tell you being there is NOTHING more than a platonic one sided friendship it is easy to see how insincere and nauseating such a "great" offer is <g> I can't believe she thinks I would rather pay as much as I do here with my pool, gym, privacy, nice big apartment all my own with my furry kids but rent "YOUR OWN ROOM" and live "in the closet". I love it in this town and have no intention of leaving my complex unless God wants me to. Un freaken real. Really unreal. I wont miss her as much as I thought.

Narcissistic Mother Calls On Father's Day - The Mask That Hides The Evil

Thoughts On My Latest Video - Karma Is Real / Narcissists Get What They Deserve

By C. Meagan Michael

Thoughts on my latest video #KarmaIsReal:

I thought people would find this interesting. So many people are ANGRY from their very core. They obsess about revenge, destruction, murder and who knows what else when they are used, abused and discarded like trash after trusting someone with every inch of their mortal life, soul and spirit. Who wouldn't be angry!?@ Forgiveness is surely the key and moving on without giving them the benefit of any residual emotion is essential for our health, happiness and spiritual growth. I believe that most of us with open eyes have similar stories to share. Hopefully, mine (I have a bit more to share at another time) will diffuse some of the rage and anger. Releasing this rage and resentment helps victims become survivors and then... Thrivers! #Peace #UnicornOut

Narcissists Get What They Deserve! - Karma Is Real

Narcissistic Mother Triangulates Father/Daughter - Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day Dad! No Matter How Far You Are Near...

By C. Meagan Michael

Happy Father's Day to my wonderful awesome dad! While you are missed deeply in the physical world I know that you have ascended. I feel you now closer than ever. Thank you for being the strong role model that you were. I admired you in life. I admire you still. You are my hero. It brings me such joy to remember you in this positive light. Never again will I mourn your "loss." Being your daughter I have clearly won.

Will Other Victims Through You Under Their Narcissists Bus?

Death Is Not The End But The Continuation - Happy Father's Day

I love my dad. He has been gone for many years now but recently I feel closer to him than ever.

I know in my soul that we do not turn to dust and cease to exist. When this incarnation is over, regardless of how it ended, our soul/spirit continues on with it's journey.

We are all part of a greater consciousness. We are all part of the universe. We can tap into the Akashic Records and find all knowledge. We can also tap into the energy of our loved ones that we miss.

Healing is all part of our journey in this life. Education and wisdom is all part of this journey. We choose our parents, and situation before we are ever born into these bodies. When we deal with issues in this life that horrify and traumatize us we need to realize that we are not helpless victims of the universe. We have chosen this life to learn.

The greatest storms, create the most turbulent times. These experiences are what shakes us up and causes us to think and process. It is all a growth experience and the bottom line is the greatest storms promote the greatest growth.

So, next time you are sitting there wondering, "why me?" Truly ponder the question and ask your higher self for the answer. Once you learn the lesson you will not be destined to repeat it.

Have a wonderful weekend. My love to everyone here there and everywhere.

Narcissistic Story Time! My Puppy Is BULLYING Me!

Death Is Hardest On The Living - Live While You Are Alive

By C. Meagan Michael

Death is hardest on the living. We have to be mindful now of self-care. Those who have ascended are at peace. Our lives must go on. Our paths in this life are unique to us . Each of us has an important role to play. The world needs us now to be our personal best. Our authentic selves. To make our contributions to the greater good.

Life is for the living. Enjoy it while you are here.

‪#‎NoSurvivorsGuilt‬ ‪#‎YourAreWorthy‬ ‪#‎LiveWhileYourAlive‬

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Reaction To Orlando Mass Shooting At Pulse - Empaths MUST Use Self-Care ...

By C. Meagan Michael

While my heart goes out to the victims, survivors and loved ones involved in the Orlando tragedy, we MUST continue to take care of ourselves. We can not allow ourselves to be triggered and set back because something terrible happens in the world. Terrible things will happen regardless of our mental state. Rebuke survivors guilt. Death is hardest on the living. Those who have ascended are now at peace. There is no bigotry and prejudice where they are now.

Why Oh Why Are We Narcissistic Supply - Financial Abuse Unmasked

By C. Meagan Michael

Beware of financial abuse. Abusers use control to keep us chained to them and enslaved. Almost always financial abuse is used to control us. Some ways that Narcissists and Sociopaths control us financially are by convincing us to give them money. We buy them things in order to try and please the unpleasable. We are trained to ignore our own wants and needs. Instead of self-care we focus all of our care and love externally on someone who only take and never gives.

Based on our childhood programming it is easy to understand why we would continuously fall into the same patterns where we will even give our last anything to please our abuser.

We project our values, morals, and ethics onto the person who love bombed us in the beginning and while mirroring us made us believe we were just alike. Two peas in a pod. We then project our own morals and ethics on them mistakenly. We believe that if we care for them they will care of us as well.

So we give and give and allow them to take and take all the while waiting for the impossible. They will never give back. They will never put you first. In fact, the hard truth is you will never matter as a human being or a soul with individual needs.

You are used. You are narcissistic supply. Your humiliation, hurt, pain, shame, and guilt which is THEIR projection on to you. (their own feelings about themselves) There is nothing you can give them or do for them or allow them to do TO you that will ever help, save or change them. The "good heart" buried deep within does not exist.

Stop fooling yourself into believing things will be different if only...

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Strong Women Make Toxic People Uncomfortable - Happily Upsetting The Applecart

By C. Meagan Michael

 Most of us grew up as people pleasers to narcissistic parents or other Family Of Origin #FOO We often are extremely empathic #INFJ #INFP and in tune with others emotions and do everything we can NOT to upset the apple cart. We do not want others to be upset at all let alone from something we said or did. 

When we set boundaries and assert our personal power, this upsets the apple cart. I have been upsetting the apple cart regularly for a few years now. While I would not purposely upset people I put my own self-care first. If that upsets someone that is not my circus and those are not my monkeys. Does it still bother me inside to know I have upset someone? Yes. Will I continue to grow as a healthy boundaried person and do what is best for me. Yes, most assuredly. 

That will mean upsetting many people throughout my life. People who want to control me and glean narc supply from me. I will never allow it to happen again and I may even smile inside knowing that my good health makes toxic people uncomfortable.