I awakened this morning with this message to share. We must allow others to live through and experience their own lessons in life. Our perpetual people pleasing ways are not allowing people to grow and learn.
Often we appear offensively arrogant in appearance as we try to "make it all better" for everyone around us. Do we have all our own "stuff" together? Are we perfect?
We lived and learned our own lessons. Has anyone ever said to you, "You need to feel better" and then you did? No, because you have not done the work. We need to process the information.
Life Lessons are what life is all about. That is how we understand and grow. Our Narcissistic Parents did not raise us this way. They did not allow us to experience, learn, grow and feel for ourselves. They muted all of our experiences and trained us to mute theirs.
We come into our new post abuse life in this same way. With all good intentions without proper people or parenting skills. Often people with pure hearts and the best of intentions can be the most hurtful and offensive.
Sometimes that hurtful and offensive person is us.
As we grow and heal we learn to reparent ourselves. When we understand how this is done and why it makes it so much easier to stop trying to "fix" everyone around us.
How many people have you ever truly "fixed" in this life with your good intentions and well meaning chats, time spent, all effort in, selflessness with others.
We mean well and as distasteful as it is to consider, we often waste our time talking "at" people who do not want to hear what we have to say. They are not ready for the message that they have not yet learned for themselves.
Are we trying to tell them what to do? How can we fix others when we ourselves are broken?
Become the person you want to be and you will attract those people into your life. We can not fix anyone in this life time. We can only coach them and help them to find themselves once we have learned how to do this for ourselves.
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