Does A Narcissist Mean It When They Say, "I Love You?"

Narcissists are incapable of unconditional love. So do they mean it when they say, “I love you?” They say it as a means to an end. If you are involved in any way with a narcissist, then you are in a "manipulationship" not a mutually beneficial relationship.

When they are done with you they can stop “loving” you as quickly as they started. You have been discarded. (It is a true blessing in disguise) 

If one of the former narcissists in your life is a Narcissistic Mother and she calls that cruel, backstabbing, disloyal, throw you under the bus for a total stranger, always conditional thing that she does, “love” than so be it.

Once we learn to truly love and respect ourselves, we will never again accept their fake love in our lives. Wrapping abuse up with a pretty bow and calling it LOVE... is still abuse.

Who Is Responsible For Creating The Life You Want After Abuse?

Many people get stuck in a post-abuse rut and are afraid to make the drastic changes needed in order to live the life that they truly want to live. Often talking and complaining about things endlessly and make no forward motion. When one is always pointing fingers at someone else and blaming them for all that is wrong in their lives they are not able to see clearly what needs to be changed and change it.

Accepting responsibility for our own lives does NOT invalidate our experience or excuse the behavior of our past abusers. We have to realize that we can only change ourselves in this life. In order to change our lives, we need to dig deep and make the changes necessary to lead the life we want. It has nothing to do with them. The best thing we can do with Toxic People is keep them our of our lives and most of all.... out of our minds.

Change can be exhausting, challenging, frustrating and scary but it is also exciting, interesting, validating and promotes spiritual and emotional growth. We MUST change our thoughts in order to change ourselves. We must change ourselves in order to change our circumstances.

Once we take responsibility for our own happiness and stop looking behind or in front of us for someone else to make things happen, we realize that our champion has been with us all along. We are our own superman.

Most Co-dependents are their own worst enemy but believe they are a best friend to everyone else. It is impossible to truly be a best friend to someone else when you have never experienced real friendship. Co-deps give and give and give, often to their own detriment. Later becoming bitter and resentful because they gave so much and it was not reciprocal.

The fault is not outside of ourselves. True everlasting change and healing must come from within.

#Accountability #SelfLove #SelfValidation #ReprogrammingOurBrains 

Are You Waiting For Others To Create Your Reality?

Hoping things will be different in life and then leaving the situation because they are not what you hoped, is not you creating your own reality. Those are the actions of someone hoping the reality that someone else creates will suit them.

Think about that for a moment...

Many of us became somewhat passive aggressive through the years. We learned to allow others to create our reality and then resented the reality that they created. Oftentimes complaining to others about this reality that did not suit us but never directly addressing the cause directly to see if something could be done to improve or change it for the situation for the better.

Through the years we were made to believe our opinions not only did not matter, but were worthless. We were made to think we were worthless so how could our opinions matter.

Expressing our opinions and feelings in the past would create conflict. Who likes conflict? Many of us became non confrontational to the extreme. If we are to truly move past being victims and survivors and thrive in this life, we need to feel comfortable and confident sharing our opinions and our feelings

Connecting With Our Gut - How To Sense A Toxic Person - Physical Red Flags